Every job has its mess

      My brother (15) got home from work at an auto repair shop and was still covered in grease and oil when I walked in the door.

      

      Brother~ Grace! Give me a hug!

      Me~Hey Mike. No! You have nastiness all over you.

      Brother~ *reaching out with hands that are literately black with engine stuff*

      Me~ I have baby spit-up, nail polish, glitter glue, and possibly poop on me. Give me a hug!

      

Neither of us got a hug, and both of us were glad. A little later...

     Me~ Wait! Don't sit on the couch, you should wash up.

     Brother~ You should wash up. 

He had a point.

Pwincesses

While the baby was sleeping, we read from a giant princess treasury book. For a while I read, then she, 4 years old, asked if she could read to me. I love her versions of the stories.

Snowhite.
Kid~ "Knock knock knock" said Snowella asked, "Let me in wight now!" * Pointing to picture of dwarfs* She wivs with hew cousins. Who's that?
Me~ Bashful.
Kid~ Then Bashable eated the dinnow. "Go to bed wite now!" said she shouted. Apple! Eat the Apple! The Amen.

Beauty and the Beast
Kid~ "I'm gonna touch that floweh." Said she asked. "No!" Then he towned into the pwince but with goal's haiw. (girl's hair) Nevow mind. That's the scawie stories.

The Little Mermaid
One day Aiwiol forgot hew toy so she asked hew mom (that's hew mom) * Pointing to Ursula* and hew mom said,"No!"
Me~ Who's that? * Pointing to the bird*
Kid~ Umm, that's Cockadoodledoo. Then... Oh No! They fell in the waterw! The alligatows! Then Aiwiol kissed the boy, said she asked. They'o mawied.

Aladdin
Kid~ One day we had fun on this wug.

So basically, Snowhite was a jerk, Bell's Prince had girl's hair (agreed), Ursula is Arial's mom, and, I agree, that's all that should've happened between Jasmine and Aliddin anyway.

Me~ Go get your shoes on.
Kid~ Umm, I'm weawing my pwincess dwess so you should say nice stuff to me.
Me~ * bowing * Please put your shoes on, your highness.
Kid~ Ok.

For pretend?

Today the four-year-old stayed home from school so I had her and the baby. My day started like this, I walked into the room where the kids were playing... the baby had no pants but still had a diaper on so...

Me~ What're you doing?
Kid~ I just changed his diaper.
Me~* Frozen. Waiting for more. Then hopefully* For pretend?
Kid~ Yeah! *grinns*

I have found that to be the ideal question for many situations. Note: Does not work on parents.

It's a little childs prayer

One of the little kids at bible study prayed tonight. It sounded something like this.

"Dear Lord, thank you for all the things yoou're blessing us with every day, and please help all of us to praise you all day tomorrow, and help all of us to not be hurting when we're hurting. And in your name Amen!

And all this while her little brother was spinning around singing "ba ba ba" and then tipping over. I love our bible study!

Grandmas Are Like That

I learned two brilliant tricks while babysitting this week. The first is as simple as warm milk.

• Step 1: Give it to the baby, he will fall asleep immediately. 
• Step 2: Give it to the two-year-old, read her a story, and she too will pass out.
  
• Step 3: Listen to the four-year-old, who you've already put to bed, yell and kick the wall for 5 to 10 minutes. (this will wear him out a little. His siblings are used to it, and will keep sleeping) Then tell him that if he is quiet you'll bring him some milk. When he says he doesn't want milk don't argue, just say it's time to go to sleep. He'll ask for the milk, drink it and fall asleep.
  
• Step 4: Some six-year-old's would get grossed out at the thought of warm milk but if not, give it to him and then have him lie down while you tell him a Bible story. He should doze off by the time you've told him three, as long as they're long enough.

I learned the other trick from a grandma. Which is almost always the case with useful childcare. 

• Step 1: Make sure every permanent marker in your house is out of reach of small children.
  
• Step 2: Give the kids a package of dry erase markers.
• Step 3: Let them color on the windows and mirrors! note. Be sure to ask parents if the house isn't yours. 

We made pumpkins!

A friend had these fall decorations in her house and I thought it might be fun to make them with the kids.

We also added curly green ribbon to be vines. 

One of the kids (8 years old) decided that her pumpkin should have the personality of a movie star. 

Me~ Is your pumpkin a boy or a girl? 

Kid~ Well, it doesn't have hair, so I don't know.

Aww! Thay'o dancing. That means thay'o mawied.

Kid age 4~  *coloring Cinderella and Prince charming * Why do boys have to dance wif giwls?

Me~ Umm

Kid~ Oh yeah. So they can get mawied. My dad was a pwince befoe, but aftoe that he got tuoned into my dad.

_____

Kid~ This is the best day evoe. 

Me~ Why?

Kid~ Cause, painting naows!

I now have half my toenails and most of a foot painted hot pink by a four year old.